first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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