I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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