someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize