What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Randomize
