normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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