I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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