so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I should be a condom model.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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