I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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