Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
