who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
