I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
