We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
My feet surprised me
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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