you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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