So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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