Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
