Christians are straight up FREAKS
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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