i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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