Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize