Don't you send me to vm
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
