i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
