You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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