so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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