there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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