they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
