We named our party play list daddy issues
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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