i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
