Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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