So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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