And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
