how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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