More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
