Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
