I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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