ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize