just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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