i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
You left your phone here
Wait...
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