i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
