I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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