You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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