dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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