I'm passing your future prison.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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