and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
