ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
