I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Ladies don't puke and tell
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
