I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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