The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize