This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize