they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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