Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
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