omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
