Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
