i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
