you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
