you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
